When it comes to doing something we love, does the doing of that thing have to have a meaning? Is it wasteful just to do it because it makes us happy? And why do some things make us so joyful that it is painful to know the contrast between that feeling and the absence of it? Again, I haven’t a clue.
For the first time in my life, and not because I have put any conscious effort into this, I know what it feels like to be present in the process. That is the blissful, happy feeling that envelopes me as I lose myself to the touch, scent, sounds and vibrations at work in my studio. I keep building and can’t stop creating even if I wanted to – it’s as if I am compelled to design and make these colorful things by something outside of myself. The collection keeps growing.
Objectively, I should stop, at least for now. Sales have dropped right now and I still have not figured out how to sell on Etsy. That, I must confess is so truly annoying! I’ve tweaked this and that; changed pictures; enhanced my tags; blah, blah, blah and I have 3 on-line sales to my name over the year! And they probably came from the kind souls who wanted to give me a reason to celebrate Christmas. Sweet. What really irks me are those folks that open a shop and no sooner than they post an item, is it sold! WHAT is up with that? More importantly, how do I get me some of that? Maybe the same force that compels me to create can intervene with buyers and sales?
Until that time, and I am confident it will come, I keep making. And even if it doesn’t come for awhile, I get to lose myself in a collection of magnificent colors and textures, and, the sheer joy of creating to life something that existed only in my imagination. My creations may not be saving the world or adding to its intellectual capital, but they do add a twinkle to the soul of my universe.